Showing posts with label philippines. Show all posts
Showing posts with label philippines. Show all posts

Friday, 18 March 2016

From Puns to Fun

3/18/2016 9:50:07 PM

On an ordinary Friday where a lot of us are expecting weekend to come -- plus the fact that we got tangled in the middle of summer heat due to a fire drill, let me tell you a story.

Well, that crashed my momentum so much that I ended up browsing a lot of feeds on Twitter by lunch time. And presto... ended up browsing a series of funny posts made by one of my friends at the independent music scene.


Meet Carlo Lava, one of the guitarists of the rocker group called Lions and Acrobats. On top of that, he is also a member of other bands around this culture, and a chief engineer of one of a popular recording studio.

Interesting enough, I approached the fella; knowing he could make his array of witty posts a worthy discussion. I initially put a hashtag called #BandPuns, but it was better when Ling decided to put on #LocalBandPuns as it gives a much-needed specification and identity on which to tackle. And obviously, it’s all about our own.

This #localbandpuns thing turned out so well it gave a lot of music listeners -- and artists themselves -- some time to take a chill pill on a scorching hot afternoon.

Here are some of the responses we just gathered.

As we hit midway on Friday afternoon, this topic reached the fourth spot of the Philippine trending list on the popular micro-blogging site. And just when you thought people will slow down, #localbandpuns served like a hot freaking merienda as fans and bands like MilesExperience, Autotelic, Jensen and The Flips also joining the party!

Man, I had a mentally exhausted day, but checking upon the feed, it was an overwhelming response. To think this became the second most discussed talk on Twitter by 5:30 PM? Wow, this shows how music is a can make everyone relate, especially at the indies. So better think twice if the music scene is dying as fuck, because the locals may have been just punning around, but they already proved the argument otherwise.




Isn’t that great? I bet Ling was feeling a lot, lot, lot better! This hashtag was made by him and for him. And I'm honored that at some point, I managed to help someone's voice be heard... and big time!

Say, I might consider a career in social media, eh?

Author: slickmaster | (c) 2016 september twentty-eight productions
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Monday, 15 February 2016

You're banned!

02/15/2016 04:44:18 PM 
Interaksyon
See what happens when you mess with a wrong guy? Ask him.
Imagine a sudden decision called out by a top sports official on one of its employee. It's like watching at a scene where one gets fired in such a humiliating manner. Or at the context of sports — with a flavor of entertainment — it's like Vincent Kennedy McMahon or her daughter Stephanie going irate and shouting “YOU'RE FIIIIIRRREEEEDD!” to anyone who dared to stand on their way (but of course, professional wrestling way too different from professional basketball).

It looked like a simple highlight clip on YouTube; for over two minutes, it appeared like a normal temperamental moment on the court. But not until the commissioner has stepped on the court and confronted Ivan Johnson, an reinforcement player for the Talk 'N Text Tropang Texters last Saturday afternoon at the PhilSports Arena in Pasig City.

And that resulted into the most harshest penalty ever set by the sports league executive — a lifetime band plus a hefty fine of Php 250,000.

So it's like you lost already a lot of money because you haven't even finished a single regular conference game at the country. Not even you reached halftime right there.

Spur-of-the-moment are the best worst words to describe this shenanigan at all. Who in the right frame of mind would do that at all? This republic's ain't Martial Law or an on-the-spot crime scene where citizen arrest is an applicable neutralizer.

Okay, I get it. He had done it a lot of times. From a basketball league in Korea in 2007, to the NBA 2008 (Atlanta Hawks, to be exact). But heck, as much as he garnered accolades, he's still human after all. Perhaps, he may be an underrated version of what has been a guy known as Renaldo Balkman.

And maybe, on his recent bye-bye stint with the Philippines, the import who powered TNT to the '15 Commisioner's Cup title, was figured out onto array of mishaps. He was part of a brawl in a pre-season game at Moro Lorenzo Gym and fined Php 50,000 plus a one-game suspension as a result.

And after years of having series of unbecoming actions towards a player, game official, and even a fan, looks like he messed up big time with a sports executive. No wonder why PBA commissioner Chito Narvasa turned on his “trigger-happy” self by firing him out of the league. Yes, both literally and figuratively.

That's what you get, Ivan. Well, as Kume said (though of course, not by any literal means). Though it may appear like he got entangled on two flagrant fouls—which automatically merits technical fouls at all and contesting them—sent him packing out of sight... and even out of mind.

But the question: is there really a due process about this incident? Not even count as a tough love, brother. Some would even tell the guy should enroll himself on anger management classes.

Perhaps, a 'fuck' word, in his eyes, was barely enough to merit a hellish-slash-just punishment, whatever you believe in.

Though honestly, he deserved the punishment. That was a huge disrespect to the authority, no matter how we think of the current cheiftain.

But certainly, due process wasn't there. It's like an instant basic principle of Newton's Law of Motion but was driven at the fast lane. Like an instant suspension ala special delivery. And to think that Narvasa was involved into array of 'popular and unpopular' decisions to run the PBA, including the banning the notable sports beat journalist Snow Badua out of the league—and even warned all personalities involved that there will be consequences should they talk to the blacklisted reporter.

Also, the sudden confrontation incident with Dondon Hontiveros. How crap is that?

Yes, just like that.

Ain't those impulsive calls an enough basis for him to earn some massive calls on his resignation from the post? 
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Tuesday, 19 January 2016

Playback: Assembly Generals (ALBUM)

1/10/2016 2:48:03 PM


When my friend Ian of Vandals on the Wall once said 2015 was the year of the Philippine hip-hop, I won’t be surprised at all. And I’m not talking about who won FlipTop Isabuhay tournament here or how many chicks were added on Abra’s fans club.

Look: collaborations may have been increasing as well as the number of quality tracks released (those you would like to hear more often than those jeepney-appropriate “reeeeemixxxx!” songs). But moreover, a lot of albums were also out in the circulation, though not having much slots on your favorite record bars.

Besides, there’s Curtissmith, Ninno, BLKD, and even Zaito who just made waves through their songs; be it on physical records or through the likes of Spotify and Soundcloud.

Take the Assembly Generals for example. This aren’t just a crossover collab effort from Team Manila, Flying Ipis, Miscellaneous and andwich/Squid9/Pedicab. These four peeps may sound much better and livelier at their gigs; but hearing their album is worth the price.

The Php400-value Assembly Generals debut record comes with a embroided package and eight of the dopest tracks you will hear on the other side of hip-hop. 

Kontrabida is an obvious favorite with a timely political and societal arguments inserted on the lyrics. But AG had more in store; tackling various talks with other notable hiphop heads collaborating with them like Skarm, and Dash.

Overall, if you’re a legit (and more legit) hip-hop head (not just those who likes digging to those “galawang breezy” tracks), Assembly Generals will get you geared up for action.May not be the very best record for the genre for 2015, but certainly part of the list.

Verdict: 8.5

Author: slickmaster | © 2016 september twenty-eight productions
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Thursday, 14 January 2016

Flick Review: Haunted Mansion

1/10/2016 12:37:46 PM

Photo credit:  moviesinthephilippines.wordpress.com
Regal Entertainment has been known for producing several memorable drama and horror films in the Metro Manila Film Festival. In fact, their Shake, Rattle and Roll was so notable it had like 15 editions.

But the 41st MMFF saw two horror movies (or even three, if you count Nilalang) in Buy Now, Die Later and Haunted Mansion, with the latter doing more serious than the former.

As far as meddling with the spirits is concerned, I only had a problem with this picture: it focused more on the teeny-boppy (and even bitchy) high school romantic affair. Yes, two boys falling in love with a girl who has a third eye and capable to combat the bad ones (that’s why Janella Salvador was on the protagonist role in the first place). As it seems, it just caused the film to lose its balance when it comes on taking the light and dark matters.

It can’t be discounted that for a serious horror flick, it had more gore-riffic images than the others. But perhaps we have seen enough in a lot of their kind. 

While Janice de Belen may be a serious contender for the best supporting actress award, I think some characters fell flat; barely not enough to comprehend her part. Somehow, the twist at the near-end portions gave a very untypical edge among the other same genre stories.

Verdict: 5.9

Author: slickmaster | © 2016 september twenty-eight productions
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Tuesday, 12 January 2016

Flick Review: Beauty and the Bestie

1/5/2016 6:34:00 PM

Photo credits: Manila Bulletin
Okay, another Vice Ganda movie. Obviously, another sure-fire hit in the box office; but moreover, another garbage in the eyes of movie geeks and critics.

However, one thing is for sure: it fared way better than My Bebe Love, another heavyweight shit at the 2015 Metro Manila Film Festival. Setting aside the popular comedian’s slapstick styles, the flick seemed to neutralize what has been a serious acting on the action scene by an effective Coco Martin. Seems this guy has been do-it-all from drama to action and now... the comedy. And to think that comic plus heavy action is somewhat a good (if not perfect) equation for a balanced type of movie. 

Though there’s still romantic element, with the twist of those friendzone and same-sex infatuation materials as part of the formula. And somehow, the combination proved too good to be true at all. 

Perhaps, Vice Ganda was just more than a comedian; he has some good acting chops lying somewhere in the movie. But it’s still unrealistic to fare well in the other movies. Okay, I get it: they want to entertain the movie-viewing public, right?

But why create such flick at the supposedly the grandest exhibition of films at the Philippines? It certainly loses the essence of making comedy films on a regular basis. 

Oh, wait, the difference is that they create a superb cast of characters, right? Still ain’t convincing. Looks like horror films are more believable then the storyline of this one.

But as I said before, if you want to be entertained, this one’s a better choice. Yes, much better than the other comical chic-flick entry here in MMFF 2015.

Verdict: 4.2

Author: slickmaster | © 2016 september twenty-eight productions
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Monday, 11 January 2016

Flick Review: Buy Now, Die Later

1/5/2016 6:47:14 PM

Photo credit: mymovieworld-coolman0304.blogspot.com
Horror and comedy converged once again as the same prods who brought you Walang Forever came up with their second entry at the 2015 Metro Manila Film Festival titled Buy Now, Die Later.

The thing is: four mini-stories mixed up in a formula that seemed a bit different from what Shake, Rattle, and Roll has been offering us ever since. Four tales telling four different people buying four various “needed’ products in one store ran by a devil-inside Santi. That somehow, fills the connect-the-dots issue right there. All of them wanted fame, betterment, but with a painful price: their respective lives.

While I admire Vhong Navarro’s serious (and a bit of comic) role here, so was John Lapus. This comedian may not do serious horror, but his effort in lightening up the movie was somehow good; perhaps shying away from being a half-half type of film. 

TJ Trinidad always looks best when he does antagonistic roles like Santi, though it may not be totally evil (as it lacks that prowess), but give him the effort to be one of the primest supporting actor in his generation.

While I admire the formula and the cats of actors and actresses here, I felt Buy Now, Die Later lacked a but of something. Or maybe it’s because they turned out to be not-so-totally serious horrific tales.

But you know what? This picture still fared up so well with the others. While a serious drama, a thriller, and a rom-dramedy racked up the top three entries in terms of quality, BNDL tells a lesson applicable even if not on a fearable, matter-of-life-and-death situation: You want some greed? There’s a price to pay, and it’s a damn hell-like one.

Verdict: 7.2

Author: slickmaster | © 2016 september twenty-eight productions
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Sunday, 10 January 2016

Flick Review: All You Need is Pag-Ibig

1/10/2016 12:57:03 PM

Photo credits: starcinema.abs-cbn.com
Seems the Star Cinema-Antonette Jadaone experiment turned out so well for the romcom scene, eh? Perhaps, it was since her project with then-Cinema One Original That Thing Called Tadhana days.

And All You Need is Pag-ibig may sound like too cliche or something with Kris Aquino being on “tackless-and-dealing-with-other’s-lovelife” self; but certainly it fared so well that it focused more on stories about the romances of both young and old. It’s like Aquino played a not-so-minimal role yet remained not-so-dull-yet-not-so-very-significant either. And the same goes with Derek Ramsay.

But you know? That is how you do a love story, Jadanone style. With animations and realizations as part of the formula, All You Ned is Pag-ibig clearly stated two things: first, romance is not just for the teeny-boppy (and sometimes, bitchy) ages. It applies to all. 

And second, love is not all about romance. While we enjoyed those sweet nothings between the roles of Mel and Eric (Jodi Sta. Maria and Ian Veneracion), it also showcased several tales of family relationships.

Those perhaps, are the lessons we should bear about love.

And if there’s another best supporting actress award, it should be given to Nova Villa. Sure, we may all know her by being Azon, Manay Dita, or Freddie Webb’s wife on Chicks-to-Chiks and Chika Chika Chicks; but apart from doing comedy, the veteran proved that her acing prowess can still stand the test of time as always-romantic Loisa, especially with Ronaldo Valdez as her partner Jaime.

It simply broke away from the stereotypes about love stories done on film without even the need of a clear degree of separation of one account to another and connecting them somewhere along the way.

Again, that is how a romantic comedy should be done. 

Verdict: 6.7

Author: slickmaster | © 2016 september twenty-eight productions
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Thursday, 31 December 2015

Flick Review: My Bebe Love #KiligPaMore

12/29/2015 11:41:46 PM

Photo credit: Wikipedia
Perhaps of all the movies who made noise for 2015 Metro Manila Film Festival, it was the current most popular fanbase who stood out the most. And who else can forget about Eat Bulaga’s prized kalyeserye duo of AlDub when GMA Films along with M-ZET Productions, APT Entertainment, Octo Arts Films and MEDA Productions teamed up to produce My Bebe Love #KiligPaMore through the direction of Jose Javier Reyes?

Somehow, it turned out to be very unusual as a lot of people bashed the movie for being too superficial and trashy for the country’s premier movie festival.

And one certain blog made a hint about doing a movie review about My Bebe Love: lower your expectations as this film was made solely for entertaining purposes.

Turns out she’s right. Aside from a breakout acting role for Maine Mendoza, it really sucked. Yes, big time (or let’s say 2016 times). The plot was quite ill-planned, perhaps due to time constraints. Here’s a bigger problem: it appeared the picture was made because of the popularity of AlDub. In short, joining the bandwagon that’s more evident on the trending list of Twitter.

I get it: sure the commercial films have a lot of ad placements somewhere in the movie. And the more popular the actor/s, the more endorsement they will be placed. The downside was barely evident when the commercials were seen on almost every scene of the movie.

And perhaps another bad blow when you see the technicality was the scene at the convenient store where Maine and Alden had met. If you noticed, the clip was inverted. And that’s not aesthetically appealing at all.

Well, give Mendoza a credit for doing so good in doing her roe as Anna. Though if you asked me, other actresses deserved the Best Supporting Actress than her. But nevertheless, I think it’s still a good one. She deserved to act more in comedy programs soon.

And in all fairness, Ai-ai delas Alas and Vic Sotto proved they can have he chemistry on-screen. Well, for some of their scenes they aren’t off-tangent.

Overall, My Bebe Love was a feel-good movie though we wish it wasn’t shown at the festivals like MMFF. I get it, it’s all business for the past years, but again MMFF needs to straighten up their priorities in life -- that is to uplift quality movies here. This shouldn’t have been a cartel market in the first place.

If you want to be entertained, go ahead. But if you’re a movie goer who thinks deeper a lot, the better spend your money somewhere else.


Verdict: 3.5



Author: slickmaster | ©2015 september twenty-eight productions
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Wednesday, 30 December 2015

Upcoming: World Poker Tour Manila 2016

12/30/2015 12:28:46 PM

If you’re a huge fan of poker, or moreover if you’re a gamer, here’s something to kick start the year with a bang. A week-long festival where there four poker tournaments will be slated at the Solaire Resort Grand Ballroom starting at the second day of 2016.

More details here:


Photo credit: www.pokertourbookings.com

WORLD POKER TOUR NATIONAL PHILIPPINES 2016 FESTIVAL OF POKER

Mark your Calendars! From January 2 to 8, the Festival of Poker will be the greatest kickoff for  2016. Book your tickets and hotel accomodations now, and be part of the much awaited tournament. 

The Festival of Poker will be the greatest kickoff for 2016. As Season 9 starts in Manila, the World Poker Tour (WPT) National Philippines will commence on the 4th of January till the 8th. A massive following of players both here and in the international scene are expected to join in this grandest WPT event in Manila, all vying for the prestige of becoming the WPT National Philippines 2016 
champion.

POKER KING CUP

Poker King Cup kickstarts the festivities on January 2nd, with a prize pot of 50,000 USD guaranteed - that's a whopping PHP2,350,000, making the champ an instant multimillionaire overnight! PKC is headed by Winfred Yu, a poker player, a visionary and an entrepreneur. He brought the big games in Macau and he now bringing it to Manila. Winfred has once again prove that his vision in making Manila one of the future gem in poker. 

TRITON CUP SUPER HIGH ROLLER SERIES - CALI CUP

Banging the new year with the Triton Cup Super High Roller Series - Cali Cup with a $200,000 BuyIn. Triton Super High Roller (SHR) Series - Cali Cup begins from January 3 - 4. The much-awaited SHR is jampacked with the best of the best from the professional poker sphere mixed with some of the most powerful and influential businessmen around the world. With a USD 200,000 buy-in, we are sure to see live poker action of epic proportions here in Manila like we've never seen before.

WORLD POKER TOUR NATIONAL PHILIPPINES

The WPT National Philippines will commence on the 4th of January till the 8th. A massive following of players both here and in the international scene are expected to join in this grandest WPT event in Manila, all vying for the prestige of becoming the WPT National Philippines 2016 champion.

Event Date: January 2 – 8, 2016 
Time: 1PM onwards
Venue: Solaire Resort - Grand Ballroom
Main Event Buy-In: $1,500 + $150

Last year, Tetsuya Tsuchikawa , the CardFather of Japan, won the first ever WPT National Philippines 2014 Championship title. Calm and strong, like his victorious hand. He knows when to call from a strong contender like Kevin Ang from Malaysia. As the skill comes handy in every decision to make. 

SOLAIRE RESORT AND CASINO

Solaire Resort is the official residence of the World Poker Tour (WPT) National Philippines, on its 2nd year. The hotel prides itself as a premier gaming hub showcasing luxury and exquisite lifestyle amenities fit for a king. Enjoy their award winning cakes by their cascading waterfall at The Oasis Garden, or have a sunset dip at their majestic pool. Shop til you drop at their fine luxury boutique stores offering all the magnificence that you may want, from eyewear and watches down to the shoes. Feeling hungry? Grab a bite at any of their any restaurants offering a variety of cuisines, from authentic Asian to fresh vegetarian plates.

WPT PLAYER PARTY
The World Poker Tour (WPT) Players’ Party to be held at the Solaire Resort and Casino Manila will be the biggest, grandest and best ever poker party! 

Featuring these acts:
MOCHA GIRLS
Those Damn Nerds
DJ Ron Poe (Ronian Poe)
Boys Night Out's SAM YG
Aliya Parcs
Aerial silk
The Emerald Dancers
For queries and updates about the event, please feel free to visit our partner media sites:
https://www.facebook.com/PokerCastAsia/
https://www.facebook.com/pokerkingclubmanila/
#WPTNPH2016
#WPTNationalPH
#WPTMANILA


[END OF PRESS RELEASE]

Author: slickmaster | ©2015 september twenty-eight productions
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Saturday, 26 December 2015

Tirada Ni SlickMaster: MMFF Edition

12/26/2015 5:56:57 PM

Photo credit: Inquirer Entertainment
So ayun na nga: Ika-41 na Metro Manila Film Festival na. Meaning, panahon na naman para mamayagpag ang mga Pinoy na pelikula sa ating bansa. At least, kahit sa dalawang linggo man lamang.

EH ANO NAMAN NGAYON?

Sa unang araw pa lamang kasi ay punutakte na ang sinehan. At sa parehong pagkakataon din ay pinuntirya ng samu’t saring kontrobersiya ang naturang patimpalak.

Ano namang bago dun? Eh parang since time immemorial naman ay uso na ang mga ito ah. Oo, mula sa panahon na ang a-artistic pa ng mga entry hanggang sa panahon na panay hanap-kita na lamang ang mga pelikula kahit basura ang nilalaman ula kwento hanggang sa teknikalidad gaya ng mga anggulo ng kamera, scoring sa musika, epektong biswal, atbp.

May ticket-swapping raw na nagaganap. Ganun? Oo ganun nga. Parang hindi na rin bago ito kung tutuusin. May mga pagkakataon kasi na hindi ka makakaknood ng sine pag di sapat ang tao sa loob ng sinehan. Kaya may mga tao na nanghihikayat na maood dun kasi nga flop ang showing.

Mariin naman itong tinaggi ng kumite ng MMFF. Yun lang.

At sa totoo lang, hindi naman ao magtataka kung ang maghahari sa talikya ng MMFF ngayon ay ang My Bebe Love #KiligPaMore na gawa ni Direk Joey Reyes at pinagbibidahan nila Alden Richards at Maine Mendoza. 

Sa malamang, dahil sikat ang AlDub, maraming pupuri dito. E mga tagahanga sila e; don’t take it away from them. Tingin ko sa pagkapull-out ng ilang pelikula ay hindi naman direkta kasalanan ng mga fans e. Well, of course, demands. Usapang economics yan. At dyan rin papasok ang corporate greed.

Ito lang nag problema. May double standard ang Pinoy. At hindi na bago ito sa ating buhay kung tutuusin. Halimbawa, kung sa 10 katao na nagreact, 9 dito ang nagsabing okay ang pelikula sa kanila, isa ang hindi. At ganun din naman sa kaso ng ibang kalahok sa Metro Manila Film Festival.

Ang pinagkaiba: pag ang mga gaya ng Honor Thy Father, Nilalang, at kung anong pelikula na kasama dun na ibang-iba sa tipikal na mga pinapalabas sa mainstream, wala namang papansin sa mga nagrereact ng negatibo.

Samantala, pag nagsalita ka ng disgusto sa mga gaya ng My Bebe Love, Beauty and the Bestie, atbp., ay tahasan kang mababash sa social media. Parang gusto kang sunugin nang buhay at mamatay nna lamang.

Ano pang silbi ng social media kung ganun?

Ay, tangina, ayos din kayo e no? Nakakalokang lipunang ito. Anong gusto niyo, kayo lang maususunod? Hindi naman yata lahatay gusto ng mga pelikula na sa tingin nila ay basura o pang kababawan lang. Siyempre, lahat tayo kanya-kanya ng taste. Kung gusto ng iba na malibang lang, syempre trip nila ang manood ng kung anong gusto nila. Subalit kung sa iba ay gusto nila ng dekalibreng palabas ay siyempre ganun din ang gagawin.

Wala sanang basagan ng trip pero kung babasagin niyo ang pananaw ng iba dahil sa pagsasabi niya ng hindi nya nagustuhan ang pelikulang hinahangaan mo, as long as hidi naman niya binash at sinabi na ang krrtisimo nang naayon sa antas na kaayusan naman, aba’y tanngina rumespeto ka. Basag-trip ka? Basagin ko bungo mo dyan e.

At bilang huli, how true na nadisqualify daw ang Honor Thy Father para sa Best Picture? Dahil pinalalabs sa ibang bansa? Dahil sa rating na masyadong hindi pabor sa nakararami? E “commercial exhibition” na nga lang eh. Hindi na nga pinapalabas sa ibang sinehan e. Award-winner na nga to e.

O baka takot lang sa posibilidad na humakot ito ng parangal sa awards night ng MMFF?

Naku ha? Umaariba na naman ang mga talangka. Sinusubuka na nga ng ilang filmmaker na iangat muli ang antsas ng kalidad ng pelikula sa Pinas, kayo naman ang regresibo na puro pera na lang ang nasa isip. 

Tama talaga si Direk Joey sa sinabi niya noong nakaraang taon. MMFF is a business. 

Bakit? Kasi it shows. Pelikula pa lang niya ngayon e halata na.

Author: slickmater | (c) 2015 september twenty-eight productions
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Wednesday, 23 December 2015

Away Pa More!

12/23/2015 12:51:59 AM

Minsan, ang pulitika sa Pilipinas ay isang napakaboring na talakayan. Saka lamang ito napapansin ng madla kapag may mga mahalaganag pangyayari gaya ng eleksyon.

At para sa isang ordinaryong araw, isang elemento ang kailangan para maging laman ng mga tao ang usapang-pulitika: kontrobersiya. Mga bagay na hidi basta-basta nangyayari sa ganun-ganun na lamang. Yung mga tipong debate tapos Ingles pa ang dayalekto nila samahan pa ng samu’t saing terminolohiya na tanging mga dalubhasa at elitista lamang ang nakakaintindi? Masyado nang mainstream yan, allo na kung gusto mong gumawa ng ingay at baka sakaling makakuha ka ng boto.


Tignan mo ‘tong mga tangang ito. Ay, este, mga nag-aaway na pulitiko dito. Pasensya na, biglang nag-channer ang inner Heneral Luna sa isipan ko habang sinasabi ko ang naturang linya.

Photo credit: GMA NEWS
Myth daw ang “safest” city sa Pinas? Eh bakit hindi mo gawing reality yan... Kahit sa Cubao man lang? E sa labas nga ng Araneta ay pugad na ng samu’t saring kabalastugan na e. Aber?

Pero... Sampalan na lang? Sabay mamaya, sapakan na lang? Tangina, baka mamaya duelo o espadahan na yan ha? Bigla ko tuloy naalala ang koro ng kantang Tablahan mula sa bandang Grin Department.

Pero mas okay sa akin ang sampalan na lang. Dahil ang tunay na lalake, nananampal. Ay. Ayaw mo maniwala? Manood ka kasi ng wrestling para makakita ka ng mga lalakeng daig pa si Stephanie McMahon, Gladys Reyes o kung sinuman ang malulutong manampal sa mga palabas.

Sapakan, asus. Lagi namang duelo yan ng mga nagmamayabang e. Pag natamaan ego nila, “Tara, sapakan na lang.” Puta, kala mo naman papalag talaga sa mano-a-mano, yun pala either tatakbo lang palayo o may hawak na baril o balisong. Either way, duwag ka pa rin kung ganyan ka.

Subalit, tangina naman. Para namang bakla tong mga to ano? Kaya nagiging sarswela o moro-moro ang pulitika sa Pilipinas e. Parang Abangan ang Susunod na Kabanata lang. Parang isang malaking palabas na ginagawang patawa lamang ang pulitika sa ating bansa.

Okay sana e. Kaso the jokes are on us sa halip na halip na the joke is on them eh. Punyeta. Kala mo naman gagawin talaga ang sampal o sapak.

Isa pa: Magpa-Pasko na. Bakit di kaya tumutok sa mga isyu na may kinalaman sa Pasko? Gaya ng kung gaano kagrabe ang holiday rush o gaano kagrabe ang mga loko-loko sa lipunan? At wag na rin pala yung mga post-Miss Universe na balita. Tapos na ang patimpalak. Magmove-on na tayo ano po.

Parang epal-vs.-punisher na naman? Bwakanangina, pare-pareho naman tayong may mga baho e. Hindi lang ilang mga pulitiko, kundi bilang mga tao. Kaya ano bang punto para punahin natin ang awayan na to?

“Para kayong mga bata,” sabi nga naman ni Isabel kila Tomas Mascardo at Antonio Luna. At sa totoo lang, ganun din ‘tong mga ‘to. Oo, parang mga bata. Mga umiiyak sa natapon na gatas. Mga magpapatayan dahil sa panis na tinapay.

Tanginang yan.

Sa kakaaway ng dalawang ‘to, nanungusan na tuloy sila ni nognog. Oo, naungusna na na silang dalawa sa presidential survey ng Pulse Asia. (Anak ng pating, hindi talaga ako naniniwala sa mga survey na ‘to kahit nagiging laman sila ng sirkulasyon. Pero anyway...)

Sige, away pa more. Ganyan kung paano i-turn off ang mga botante. Parang reverse psychology lang sa advertising ah. Labasan ng baho. Nagpakita ng “tunay na kulay.” (Pero ang kupal pa rin ng sinumang nagpauso niyan dahil hindi naman lahat ng “tunay” ay negatibo.)

Yun nga lang huwag lang sana silang maging bobotante gaya ng tipikal at nakararami.


Author: slickmaster | © 2015 september twenty-eight productions
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Friday, 30 October 2015

Tirada Ni SlickMaster: "Extend" Pa More? Extend N'yo Mukha N'yo!

10/31/2015 12:53:05 PM

Photo credits: Walkah Walkah; Inquirer
Nakakalokang lipunang ito. Puno ng bunganga’t panay reklamo ang laman. 

Oo, wala sanang masama sa pagbubunganga kung gaano kamiserable ang mga bagay-bagay sa ating bansa. 

Parang kung gaano ba kapangit ang serbisyo ng ilang ahensya; kung gaano tayo pinaghihintay sa pila na diaig pa ang mala-forver na pagmamahalan sa mga paborito nating tetleserye’t pelikula. Kung gaano tayo nababagot sa pakikipagtalo kung may forever o wala, habang naisastuck sa trapiko sa EDSA at alinmang pangunahing kalsada. Kung bakit ang bababaw ng mga panukalang ipinapasa sa kongreso (kung tutuusin, kasingbabaw nga lang yan ng kwentong pinapanood natin e) At higit sa lahat, kung bakit ang mga nuknukan nang kakupalan at kaungasan ang nakaupo sa pamahalaan na naglilingkod dapat sa ating mga mamamyan.

Ayos sana ang pagrereklamo natin e. Ito nga lang ang mas malala: ilan naman sa atin ay may ugali na hindi naman natin dapat ginagawang parte ng ating kaugalian. Nagrereklamo tayo sa pagiging malambot ng otoridad pero hindi naman sumusunod sa batas? Nagrereklamo tayo kung bakit baha inaabot natin sa tuwing sumasapit ang tag-ulan samantalang tayo naman ay nagtatapon ng basura sa mga estero?

Nagrereklamo tayo kung bakit tiwali at incompetent ang mga nakaupo samanatalang hindi naman tayo bumoto?

At nagrereklamo tayo ng extension sa deadline samantalang hindi natin pinapansin ang voter’s registration program ng Commission of Election (COMELEC) nung nagsimula ito noong 2014?

Aba’y nakakagago naman pala kung ganun. Bakit tayo hihirit ng extension? Bakit tayo aapela na dapat ay maiextend ang voter’s registration hanggang Enero 8, 2016? Nakakalokang lipunang ito o. Kung andyan pa ang dating chairman na si Sixto Brillantes ay sa malamang nakatikim na naman kayo ng bato-batong kataga.

Teka, bakit “extend pa more,” mga hijo’t hija? Ano ang pinaglalaban natin? 

Busy sa trabaho? Unless wala kang leave na maaring gamitin, ano pa ba ang maaring excuse mo? Pucha, ultimong mga walang trabaho nga e (o sa mas marahas na termino, batugan) at estudyante pa lang, basta nasa wastong edad ay may K na gamitin ang kanyang right of suffrage e. Kung OFW naman, naglabas rin naman yata sila ng registration para sa absentee voting.

Ahh, dahil ba sa mga gaya ng AlDub, Pastillas Gir, Pabebe Girls, #hugot fever, at kung anu-ano pan pautot ng mainstream entertainment? May Internet naman para makapag-catchup ah. Mantakin mong mas napapaglaanan mo pa nga yata ang mag-Facebook at Twitter, kesa sa icheck mo ang email mo at mag-research e.

Sa madaling sabi, ang haba ng panahon nang nilaan para sa inyo. Ganyan kayo kamahal ng pamahalaan niyo kahit madalas ay sablay-sablay sila sa mga serbisyo nila. Oo, kahit gaano niyo binabash sa social media at minumura ang ilang mga opisyales na nagpapakatapat (kahit ang ilan ay talaga namang likas na siraulo pagdating sa customer service), at least itong COMELEC na ito, gumawa pa rin ng paraan para i-acocomodate kayo. Naglagay nga sila ng satellite booth sa ilang publikong lugar gaya ng mall ‘di ba? (Kitam mo, may mall pa nga e. Sabagay, panay sine lang yata na nagpapalabas ng kalandian ang ianaatupag mo pag andun ka e.)

Nagkaroon pa kamo ng 12-hour operation sa bawat araw mula Lines hanggang Linggo. Pustahan tayo, baka nga hindi pa sapat ang sahod sa mga empelyado na nagging bahagi ng programang yan. Maawa ka rin paminsan-minsan. Panay sarili lang—gaya ng pagdownload mo ng Heneral Luna sa Torrent (example lang)—ang pinili mo e.

Ang lawak na rin ng mga public service announcement ng mga TV network na pinapanood mo araw-araw. Ilang beses kung i-ere ang mga ito. Palagiang pinapaalala pa yata sa mga piling palatuntunan. No Bio, No Boto nga sabi ng slogan ng COMELEC; samantalang sa isang network naman ay in-emphasis ang halaga ng boto ng bawat taong lalahok. Isipin mo na lang yun: kung hindi ka bumoto, wala ka dapat na K na magreklamo. (Pero dahil nga nasa Pilipinas tayo—na isang malayang bansa to the extent na nagiging pasaway tayo sa sariling batas at may say sa lahat-lahat ng mga bagay—sorry na lang ako.)

Pero bakit “extend pa more” ulit?

Dahil ayon sa Section 8 ng Voter’s Regitstraion Act, dapat ay tinatapos lamang ang registration period isangdaan at dalawampung araw (120) lamang bago ang regular election. Kaya ayon sa nasabing peitsyon ay illegal raw ang pag-set ng COMELEC nag awing Oct. 31 o halos kalahating-taon bago ang nakatakdang halalan.

Ah, ganun? Hanapan pala ng butas kung ganun. Maaring mali ang COMELEC dahil sa naturang hakbang na ito. Pero maliban dun, ano naman ang repklesyon sa ating lipuanng ito?

Na mahihilig tayo sa last minute. Mañana habit, sabi nga naman nila. Parang estudyante lang, mahilig sa cramming. O minsan, applicable din ito sa ating mga nagtatrabaho. Kung kelan malapit na ang deadline, saka lang tayo kikilos.

Ganun? Oo, ganun nga. Ang gagara din natin, ano po? Balik sa tanong. Bakit “extend pa more” ang hinaing natin?

Samantalang mula Mayo 6 pa pala tayo hinihikayat ng COMELEC na magparehistro at magpa-validate n gating biometrics? Kukulit din kasi natin e. Isipin mo na halos labing-pitong (17) buwan na pala tayo kinukulit ng COMELEC para ditto. Tapos may gana tayong magreklamo kung bakit ang haba ng pila; kung bakit ang bagal nito; pati yung proseso ng serbisyo? Isama mo na rin yung mga kung anu-anong shenanigan na nagaganap.

Mga gao pala kayo e. Ang haba na ng panahon na nilaan sa inyo ay ganyan kayo. Ayusin niyo kaya ang ugali niyo at iwas-iwasan ang “mamaya na” habit?

Ay, busy? Punyeta, sapat bang excuse yan sa haba ng panahon na nilaan? Tsk.

Ay, extend pa more? Extend niyo mukha niyo!

Author: slickmaster | ©2015 september twenty-eight productions
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Saturday, 24 October 2015

Why o Why???

10/25/2015 9:55:30 AM

Ang daming nabadtrip. Matutuwa na sana sila e. Makikialam na sana sila sa darating na halalan sa May 2016.

Kaso may problema: ayaw ng tao ang partner niya. As in yung kasama niya para sa ticket niya bilang pangulo. Yung bise-presidente ba.

Bakit ganun?

Well, sino ba naman ang hindi mababad-trip kung ang gusto mong kandidato ay pinili ang isang tao na ayaw mo? Na para bang si Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago, na tatakbo sa 2016 Presidential Elections, ay pinili si Senator Bongbong Marcos bilang kanyang bise-presidente?

Sino ang hindi mababagot kung maalala nila ang apilyedong yun, na naging matunog dahil sa Marital Law? Kaya nga nauso ang hashtag na #NeverAgain, ‘di ba? Akala ko noong anibersaryo lang ng Martial Law (noong Setyember 21) lang ginagawa ito.

Baka naman sa malamang, may pagkakaiba naman siguro sila Bongbong at Macoy, ano? Besides, iba na rin ang panahon. Magkakaroon pa ba ng martial law kung sakaling maluklok siya sa pwesto? Duda ako sa totoo lang kahit sa aktwalidad ay nagawa ni Francis Underwood ito.

Ngunit kalokohan naman kung ihahambing natin ang kakayahang ito dahil lamang sa panonood ng House of Cards (at ano nga ba ulit ang programang ito? Sorry panay wrestling, at basketball lamang tinatangkilik ko sa TV e).

Pero… bakit daw, Miriam? Bakit?!??!?? (O kung medyo OA ka, Punyeta naman, BAAAAKIIIIITT?!!)

Sinasabi na isa sa mga masisipag na Senador ang nakababatang Marcos, lalo na noong nasa kongreso pa siya. Nag-push ng mga panukala para sa mga pabahay, programang pang-rehablitasyon sa mga bata na nagigipit sa mga lugar ng may sigalot, sa industriya ng soybean, sa pananaliksik at pag-develop ng hydrogen, at sa mga programa nan aka-akma sa welfare ng mga guro.

Isa rin si Bongbong sa mga tumuligsa sa pagpataw ng hatol sa impeachment case ni dating Supreme Court Chief Justice Renato Corona noong 2012. 

Pero bakit ayaw nila sa taong ito?

Ahh… dahil ba sa Martial Law? Dahil may stigma pa rin ba tayo ng mga pangyayari apat na dekada na ang nakalipas?

O dahil natututo at sinusubukan pa ring matuto sa kasaysayan? Oo nga naman kasi. Pag hinayaan kasi natin na maluklok siya bilang VP, parang ang dating sa atin ay “history repeats itself,” ‘di ba?

E ang problema, hindi naman yata siguro ang mangyayari. Hindi kaya masyado rin tayo mapaghusga? O dahil ayaw natin maranasan ulit ang serye ng mga ganoong bagay?

Siguro, never again sa corruption. Well, lahat naman tayo ay magkakasundo sa ganitong adhikain e. Oo, punyeta, lumayas nga ang mga tiwali sa pamahalaan. Pero ang problema: long shot ang goal na ‘yan. Ika nga ni Heneral, kailangan ng radikal na pagbabago.

At ito ang problema: nagiging siklo lamang ang mga bagay-bagay kaya hindi siya nagiging radikal.

Pero punyeta naman. Kung hindi natin gusto ang kapareha, e di pumili tayo ng iba? Halos may mga ganitong sitwasyon rin naman sa iba’t ibang kandidato noong mga nagdaan na elesyon ah. Yung iba nga na nakausap ko noong 201 elections, trip pala si Gibo; Ngunit dahil sa nasa tiket siya ng administrasyon, hindi binoto. Sa halip, yung iba na lang. Dahil ba sa siya sikat? Ewan ko bagamat yun naman ang kadalasang dahilan e; regardless kung sikat dahil sa mga nagawa o dahil sa tarantado siya sa mata ng mga balita.

Saka saang bansa ka nakakita na pag nanalo ang pangulo, ganun din dapat ang pangalawang pangulo? 

Sa Estados Unidos, at hinahalal din sila. Pag nanalo nga, pati ang partido, damay.

Pero tangina naman, wala tayo sa Amerika. That’s so US-of-A. Iba naman ang bansa natin. Sa isang bansa na malaya ang bawat mamayan para pumili—sa kabila ng karumihan ng pulitika (ginagawa pa nga itong negosyo ng ilan)—HINDI mangyayari yan. Kailan ba ang huling beses na nagkaroon tayo ng winning Pres-VP tandem? 2004? 

Pero anong petsa na, mga hija’t hijo? At sa tingin mo ba nangyayari ba ‘yun ng madalas sa mga nakaraang administrasyon? 

Naaaaahhh. 

May karapatan tayong pumili. Huwag tayong magpadala masyado sa mga branding at advertising. Nagagawa nga natin pumili kung AlDub o Pastillas Girl ang papanoorin natin e. Nagagawa nga nating pumili sa pagitan ng “Bayan o Sarli” eh.

Kaya may K ka na hindi iboto ang ayaw mo. Hindi mo na kailangan pang mang-bash sa social media. Ay, nagasabi ka nga pala ng opinion mo no? Pero ganun naman tayo palagi e. Ayaw natin, sasabihin natin., Magrereklamo tayo. Okay lang yun, as long as kung ikaw mismo ginagampanan mo ang tungkulin mo bilang mamayan. Baka nga hindi ka nagbabayad ng Vat eh; o hindi nagtatapon ng basura sa tamang basurahan. 

At baka naman, hindi ka pa nagpaparehistro muli. (Kung ganun, tangina mo, wala kang K na magreklamo.).

At kung tutuusin nga, ang dami na nating sablay sa pagpili sa mga eleksyon e.

At sa tingin mo ba, matututo tayo sa 2016?

Author: slickmaster | ©2015 september twenty-eight productions
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